realization

istuti wondered whether beauty really lied in the eyes of the admirer. if i did then why did only one man out of the crowd of million can identify her real beauty.she looked in the mirror and saw herself as she has always been, as she could always remember herself to be like . since she became concious of herself and other people around herself she remembered herself as a bright student, a good and obedient girl who obeyed all her seniors wishes and studied hard to be known and seen as a smart and intelligent girl. all she could think of from her chilhood was books and good books and some more books.in the mirror she saw a girl, with eyes that were intentionally dwarfed by the big glasses that she donned. her hair was nicely oiled and combedand sticking perfectly with the base of her skull. there was nothing that was uneven, nothing out of place yet nobody or perhaps no boy ever took any interest in heror more importantly never took pains to talk to her. she thought of the boys as some notorious creatures similar to monkeys though she never made any effort to interact either. she was afraid of using cosmetics that her friends used liberally, afraid that it might make her look quite unlike herself.it wasnt that she was very bad looking either - she just happened not to show much significant signs of womahood, signs which pulled boys towards her friends, but she never wanted to talk to boys, she believed in simple living. she believed that one must be content with the skin that god gave us and so she shunned all kind of cosmetics.she took out her big magnifying glasses and for some moments she couldnt recognise herself. it was hazy - but soon the mist in front of her eyes cleared. she took out her hairpin and let her hair fall to her shoulders.few hours back, she was returning from college in local bus when she met a boy - almost the same age. he came and occupied the vacant seat next to her. he looked at her and she looked away.
"what makes you think that you are beautiful enough for me to stare at you.", that boy retorted sarcastically.istuti looked at him - he smiled."OK, so you are the book-worm type.""no.""no,no its notyour problem - i believe you cant help it - being studious, 4 eyes are definitely an added advantage, dont you say.""excuse me, Mr. do i know you.""ofcourse you dont, but does that really matter."he smiled without looking at her." you mustn't be having any boy-friend either, do you."his comments hurt like daggers in istuti's heart but she didnt show it on her face."you are not that bad either, its just your attitude, your being a four-eyed genious and that oil on your head, and not to forget the books - i guess, but ofcourse you cant help it. can you?"the bus topped and he sttod up. he smiled and put his hand out but she was too numb to realise that she had to shake it as well. he didnt mind it either.she looked at her face - without her glasses and with her hairs all messed up." i am not that bad, am i" she smiled at herself. she picked up the lipstick from the table. she felt better.


the end...........